Disabilty benefits & medical

Once upon a time before I got ill I was a hotshot lawyer.  Not really.. (the lawyer part is true) but I had a job I'd worked hard to qualify for & was doing ok!  With my job it was good socially too, which meant lunch out & after work drinks sometimes.

Fast forward several years & instead of that I now have to prove to the benefits people that I really am too poorly to work.
Yeah..because I just love being like this.
I just love feeling like absolute rubbish all the time.
I just love needing carers to help me.
I just love feeling totally useless!

The reason for this post is because I have just had a letter from a company called Atos, who some people may have heard of as they've been in the press on & off for a while.  They have given me a date for an appointment for a medical assessment very soon.  Atos carry these assessments out on behalf of the DWP.  They have been criticised massively for twisting what people say & for being more bothered about completing questions on a computer screen rather than listening to what people say. There are horror stories galore!

Despite me sending various paperwork & a report from my social worker who did a review earlier in the year regarding my carers, I have still been called in.  I am really anxious about it but I don't know why as I am genuinely poorly & unable to do a lot of the stuff they require for you to be fit to work.

The stress of having to go for it will flare my M.E symptoms up even more & I will really suffer for it.  As much as I am trying not to worry it is difficult not to.

It just makes me really angry as you hear of so many people claiming benefits when you know they have nothing wrong with them. Why are those people not found & their benefits taken off them when people who are entitled struggle so much to get them?

To have to claim benefits in the first place when you were used to working & bringing in a good wage is pretty soul destroying. Filling out the forms where you have to delve deep into your condition & think of all the stuff you are restricted doing is really depressing.  And now I will have to go over it again face to face with someone assessing whether I am in fact fit or unfit to work.

I wish I was.  But hey ho, such is life.


  1. I imagine it's a very stressful time, we all know just how cruel and brutal atos can be and the benefit system doesn't like those people who have M.E... I suppose they have a list of suitable illnesses somewhere and we aren't on it. Not ill enough for them maybe?! (PFFFF!) The whole system angers me, whilst I understand they need to take certain security measures to prevent fraud, it also makes it almost impossible to deal with them. Best of luck with it Ali!

    1. Thanks Hayley, spoke to my doctor today about it & she reassured me a bit. Been so poorly this week & sure it's because of this! Xx

  2. I'm so sorry to hear you're having to go through this lovely, it's so completely wrong and makes me absolutely furious! My mum went through the same thing and she ended up seeking helping from a local charity, I don't know if you have one that you could go to for advice? From what my mum went through my advice would be to give the worst case scenario for everything they ask; she made the mistake of trying to pick out the positive things she can do and they twisted it all. I really really hope it goes ok for you lovely and you get it all sorted soon, it's so incredibly unfair that you have to go through this and I really hope it doesn't make you flare up too badly <3
    Lots of love and hugs xxxx

    1. Thanks so much for your comments Holly. Good advice & my doctor said similar last week so shall definitely remember that! I feel bit calmer about it now as know worrying will make me much worse & can't afford to be!! Hugs xx


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