My baby turns 6

This is just a quick post a few days before my amazing little girl's 6th birthday. Where have the years gone?

As you will know if you read my blog, she is my absolute world & gets me through my worse days by making me smile, being there with a big cuddle & generally just making me proud. I feel very lucky to be her mummy & as difficult as things are I wouldn't change it for anything.

She is quite a comedian & has me in stitches all the time with the stuff she comes out with. But she also says lovely things a lot too. The other day we were having fun with make up (which I will be blogging about very soon)! I basically let her loose on my face with it & afterwards I asked her if I looked beautiful & she said "yes, but you always look beautiful mummy". Just the cutest!

She is having a joint party with my niece tomorrow then her birthday is the following day, so I am trying to rest as much as possible before it. Yesterday involved putting party bags together & resisting the urge to eat loads of sweets!

Her presents are wrapped... She asked for a globe & a book about rocks!! Very random, but that's what she is getting along with some other bits. I can't wait to see her little face when she gets up on her birthday.

I always get a bit emotional as her birthday approaches & told her earlier I was. I asked if she knew what emotional meant & she said "does it mean excited?" Bless her.

Happy 6th birthday my beautiful Princess. I love you to the moon & back and to infinity & beyond. You are my sunshine xxxxxx

Ali
M.E Mummy A
xx

Team Princess 2015

It's 12 years since I got my diagnosis of M.E. And yet here I am, still poorly. March 2003 will never be a particularly happy memory!

I have had a really bad week healthwise. My usual positivity wavered. There has been lots of tears & moments of despair. The knowledge that I have to keep going is almost torturous sometimes. I have to carry on living like this though because what other choice do I have? My daughter is almost 6 & she has never known her mummy to be well. Which breaks my heart but she keeps me going.

However, it is that time of year again. No, not Spring (although I am liking the sunshine!) ...Team Princess is back!!

It's getting close to M.E Awareness day on May 12th. Which means Team Princess AKA The Princesses and M.E rears its head again. Woo hoo! Last year was when our fantastic fundraising Team of Princesses (& 1 Queen), all of whom are sufferers, was born. See my previous posts about it all here & here.

Our fabulous Queen Sian, who came up with the idea, has done a really detailed blog post about it here. It gives all the information about this year's plans. We will be donning our costumes, tiaras or whatever else we fancy on May 12th & I have something fun in mind.

We raised over £4000 last year for the charity Invest in ME but this year it will be a bit different as we will be supporting more M.E charities both in the UK & other countries.

Last year was made all the more special by our very own Princess Allan who was such a good sport on the day & made a better Princess than all of us in his shocking pink wig! Very sadly, a few months later Allan passed away & it hit the online M.E community really hard. This year, in tribute to him, we will all be wearing or accessorizing with something pink on the day.

I will be setting a JustGiving page up shortly so will post more about that when it is done.  We had so much amazing support last year so I really hope we can again this year. As well as raising awareness, we aim to make as much money as possible towards funding vital research in finding a cure for this horrific condition.

If you have any questions or would like to join Team Princess then please let me know :-)

Ali
M.E Mummy A
xx

Mother's Day & what being a mum means to me

Today is Mother's Day here in the UK. I am lucky to have a good relationship with my mum & we are friends as well as mother & daughter. She has been there for me for as long as I can remember. During the last 12 years since my M.E diagnosis she's been there with a shoulder to cry on, as a sounding board when I have needed to rant & with a hug when I've been so poorly & all I had wanted to do was run away. She sometimes buys me flowers just because. She is also very funny & makes me laugh a lot. I am lucky to have her.

I also feel very privileged to have a beautiful little girl who makes me very proud. Hearing her call me mummy makes me feel so good. I love her so much & she literally brightens each day.

When you have chronic illness it is not always easy to smile as you are so consumed by symptoms sometimes that you feel suffocated by it. Before I had my daughter I felt lonely, despite having people around me. It is possible to feel alone even if you are constantly surrounded by others. I felt I had no purpose anymore, that the life I had built for myself & worked hard to achieve was over. Illness took over & made me feel like I was useless.

However, this little person came along & changed everything. She is my sunshine. My princess. My world.  She makes me smile every day. It is so difficult being a parent when you are poorly but I now try to focus on the things I can do rather than dwelling on what I can't.

As she is growing up (she is 6 in a few weeks), she becomes more & more aware of & helpful towards me & my condition. Last week she knew my back was aching while I was sorting out her breakfast. She said she would be "back in a sec" & appeared with a hand massager then started rubbing my back! Such a little cutie.

A beautiful friend of mine send me a message earlier that made me cry. It said:

"Happy Mother's Day to you
You're one inspirational mummy and you've done what so many people in our position are often afraid to do.
I fully salute you and am honoured and proud to know you. Xxxxxxx love you"

Hearing stuff like that makes me feel very emotional but also very proud.

To all the mums out there, I admire you all. We have the best job in the world.

Love & hugs also to those who have sadly lost their mums & to any mummies of Angel babies. You are in my thoughts.



Ali
ME Mummy A
xx

This or That tag

When the lovely Steph at Blossom and Bloom Sparkles  tagged me (a while ago now ooops) to do the This or That tag I thought I would have a go so here we are!


Red or white wine?
I am in tolerant to alcohol these days thanks to the M.E but I do like a nice glass of red!

City or countryside?
We live in Leeds which is a mega busy city but we are also really close to the countryside & I sometimes think I would quite like to live out in the sticks for the peace & quiet! I am not really a country bumpkin though so not sure how well I'd cope.. I get scared of the dark too so can imagine me freaking out a bit in the middle of nowhere!

Cats or dogs?
If I had a choice I'd have a dog but the fact I can't really walk much kind of makes that a bit difficult! My mum has a cat & he's lovely but I've never really been a big cat person (sorry to all my crazy cat lady friends).

Sweet or savoury?
Savoury every time. Chocolate & cake I can happily cope without (most of the time) but crisps are my downfall. And nice bread, cheese, crackers & dips is one one my favourite things ever!

Dresses or jeans?
Dresses. I love them. End of.

Heels or flats?
Heels look better but I mainly wear flats these days. However using a wheelchair means you can get away with wearing high ones so I quite like being in the heels & wheels brigade!!

Beyonce or Taylor Swift?
My daughter loves Taylor so as it makes me giggle seeing her sing I'll go with her.

Tea or coffee?
Tea. Nothing beats a nice cup of strong Yorkshire tea. I drink a bit too much sometimes but it makes everything better doesn't it? And it's so very British!

Divergent or The Hunger Games?
Can't say I've seen either...

Blog posts or YouTube?
I have recently become addicted to watching make up tutorials on YouTube. I can't believe I haven't been an avid viewer until now! My wishlist is rapidly growing...

Skincare or makeup?
Make up. I love it (see my previous blog post!!) I have a pretty basic skincare routine but it seems to work ok. Clean & Clear dual Action Moisturiser works really well so am sticking with that for now.

Morning or night?
I have always hated mornings. Even before I got ill. They are evil! Night time these days is when I should be asleep but I end up watching stuff in bed until silly o'clock which probably doesn't help with the evil mornings...

Books or magazines?
I do love a good book but haven't read one for ages. My concentration is so bad that I can't seem to keep focused. Although I haven't bought a magazine either for months. I used to get subscriptions to a few but cancelled as I never read them so they use to pile up until I would end up giving them away.

Facebook or Twitter?
I go through phases with both. I used to love Twitter but you do get some strange ones on there & some stuff happened a while ago that scared some of us off! I enter competitions & do chat to some lovely people but I am not as big a fan of it as I was. Facebook I like as you control who sees your stuff to some extent but people can be annoying on there too! I prefer Instagram to them both.

Summer or Winter?
Summer. I would move somewhere hot in a shot. The sun also helps my M.E symptoms slightly & who doesn't feel or look better with some colour!

City?
One of the nicest places I've ever been is Krakow in Poland. I would love to go back one day. It's such a beautiful, cultural city.

Book?
I really like stuff by Jodi Picoult but it isn't the easiest stuff to read & it's always quite harrowing. I still haven't read all my (signed!) Keith Lemon book either!!!

Film?
Not sure I can pick a favourite but some of my top ones are Leon, Shawshank Redemption, Pretty Woman, Elf (massive contrast to the first 2!) & Save the Last Dance. Pretty varied.

Tv show?
Celebrity Juice. I mean come on, it's brilliant!

Perfume?
Dolce Vita by Christian Dior. All time favourite. And was the inspiration for my tattoo (which if you didn't know I had, well you do now)!

Skincare item?
Elizabeth Arden 8 hour cream.

Lipstick?
Bourjois velvet rouge edition.

Foundation?
I really like Mii mineral foundation but am looking for something new so would love suggestions.

Food?
Cheese & crackers (as above!!) But also partial to Chinese, Thai & Italian food.

Dessert?
Profiteroles. Yum.

Places to eat?
We have some fab local café places which are some of my favourites. I also love a place called Sukothai who do amazing Thai food.

Alcoholic drink?
As mentioned above I am intolerant to alcohol since I have had M.E but I really love Amaretto. On the rocks or with cranberry juice. Mmmm pass me the bottle...

Non alcoholic drink?
Fentimans rose lemonade. And they have the coolest bottles ever too.

Actor/actress?
For comedy Will Ferrell. I really like Leonardo DiCaprio (who doesn't), Channing Tatum (we all know why!), Matt Damon. Hmmm I appear to have focused on males. Oops.

Album?
One of my all time favourite albums is Christina Aguilera Back to Basics. I saw her live years ago & she was amazing. I love music though & like so many different types so it's hard to pick just one artist.

What does the future hold for you?
I would love to say good health but I have no idea if that will ever happen. Seeing my princess grow & continue to me smile like she does every day.

Thanks for reading & I will tag a few others on my social media! Have enjoyed doing this so thanks Steph for the tag :-)


Ali
ME Mummy A
xx