05/09/2014

Children & poorly parents

I had a funny turn the other day while my daughter was with me but luckily I had a carer there too.  I think it may have been due to low blood sugar but it has been happening a bit recently.  When it happened I went really light headed & dizzy so went to lie on the sofa. She suddenly appeared with cushions which she put under my head & legs. She then went off & came back with her Peppa pig (see my kids tv post!) blanket & put it over me. She is only 5 years old & it made me so proud that she would think to do it but also sad at the same time.

It got me thinking about how it must be for children seeing their parents poorly. For my daughter, it's all she's ever known as I had M.E when I had her & as a result she is so caring & thoughtful.  I would be lying if I said I didn't feel a bit guilty about it (not that I had any choice) as I would rather she didn't have to see me poorly & as a mummy who can't do a lot of the things other mummies do. BUT at the same time it has made her so non-judgemental & it has always been commented on how kind & caring she is.

At nursery, even as a toddler, she would help the others if anything happened to them & we were often told what a lovely nature she had.  At pre-school when we had parents evening, the teachers always said the same & how as well as the other children she was thoughtful towards adults too.  In her file we got at the end of year there were various observation sheets which they had filled in where she had done lovely stuff for others. In her first year of school they also said it & as well as helping if anyone was hurt she would say stuff to the teacher like "that's a nice top you are wearing"!! She just likes helping people & being thoughtful is part of how she is.

I think she must be like it because of how I am with my condition & when I look at it like that, as much as I'd like to be what I class as 'normal' it makes me proud to have such a lovely little girl. Don't get me wrong, she isn't so lovely all the time & is brilliant at arm folding, feet stamping & having an attitude more suited to a teenager!  The joys of having girls..

Some parents try to hide from their children how poorly they are to protect them but it just wasn't an option for me. My daughter understands my condition now, she knows I have M.E & knows I don't have a lot of energy.   She sometimes says stuff like "mummy don't try to lift that (whatever it is) as you aren't very strong & you have M.E"! Or "you stay there & I will get that to save your legs".  Makes me well up every time.

She will also sometimes say things, when she is playing with dolls for example, about one of them having M.E so is going to lie down to rest for a bit.  I would rather she didn't have to know about it all but it is how things are.

I met up with a friend recently who also has M.E & it was the first time we'd met in person as we became friends online.  My daughter adored her & she said something along the lines of she knew she had M.E like mummy has so she knew she needed to be gentle with her. Just so cute.

She makes me feel so happy every day & on my worse days, once I see her it lifts me loads. Proud to be her mummy ♡












9 comments

  1. She's beautiful and such a cutie! It's so lovely and heartwarming to hear she cares for you! As a daughter, I always feel sad and worried if my parents are ill so I can't imagine how it would feel if they had a chronic illness. Loads of love, Chloe

    http://chloe-meandme.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/avon-coral-beat.html?m=1

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  2. She's beautiful and such a cutie! It's so lovely and heartwarming to hear she cares for you! As a daughter, I always feel sad and worried if my parents are ill so I can't imagine how it would feel if they had a chronic illness. Loads of love, Chloe

    http://chloe-meandme.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/avon-coral-beat.html?m=1

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  3. Thanks so much Chloe :) she is a good girl (most of the time!!) Xx

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  4. Don't discredit that she's also learning how to be caring from you. Not just because your ill but because of the lovely and caring things that you do. All the little things that mean big things that you do for others. She might have an ill Mummy but she has a Mummy that loves her and can teach her to be caring and kind and understanding. That's the main things a child needs and she has it in spades. Please don't blub now.

    And you know when she said that I wanted to melt.

    So much love for you both. Xxx

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    1. Was already blubbing before I got to that bit! Such lovely words, thank you sweetheart xx

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  5. Such a beautiful little girl, I know we had a conversation about this recently but growing up around those that are ill or who have disabilities only makes them grow into a more considerate and caring person. Of course you would rather not be a poorly mummy but having Lucia grow into such a precious little thing with such a caring and kind nature is something to be happy about. She was so bloody cute as a little'en too! (Still is, but that first photo is adorable!)

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    1. Sorry haven't replied sooner Hayley just seen this now! Thank you & you're right :) I love that first pic too ♡ xx

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  6. Aww your daughter is just the cutest, you must be so proud! It's so lovely that she's so caring and thoughtful towards others too. :-) xxx

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    1. Sorry only just replying Lauren, thank you! Very proud :) xx

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